Having sex with wife
Carl: While my kid was in the shower my wife decided to seize the opportunity and fuck me. But I was wasted… (You can see it on his face as he realizes what could have happened) oh god I hope he didn’t hear us.
Me: What if he did?
Carl: Oh man I hope not.
Me: Haha what if he walked in… How awkward would that be?
Carl: That would be awkward as hell.
Me: What if he was like “Can I jump in?”
Carl: What the fuck man? Thats nasty!
Me: WOULD YOU LET HIM!?!?
Carl: You’re fucking disgusting.
Me:(As Carl is walking away from me) You would wouldn’t you!? I mean c’mon, the kids gotta learn sometime, who better than his dad and step mom?